Thursday, October 28, 2010

Talk Thursday: Things That Make You Go "Hmmm?"

So I'm reading this book.. "This Will Change Everything" by John Brockman. In 1997 he started www.edge.org and invited the nation's top thinkers to join the group. He got together astrophysicists, molecular biologists, evolutionary biologists, computer scientists, neuroscientists, cognative scientists, mathematical physicists, quantum-mechanical engineers, scientists in fields I've never heard of, nor can I pronounce- and added a mix of M.D.s and psychologists, writer's and artists. His idea was to get these "thinkers" to ask each other the questions that they ask themselves.

Each year, on the anniversary of the formation of this group, he poses a question to them. They answer in a brief essay and he compiles those into a book. Last year's question was this:

WHAT WILL CHANGE EVERYTHING?
"What game-changing scientific ideas and 
developments do you expect to live to see?" 

 The replies have definitely offered some food for thought, some interesting... some just plain scary. Multiple entries talked about chips implanted in the brain for multiple purposes. One idea was that cell phones would become obsolete. Instead of dialing on a phone, we'll think of the person we want to call and "poof", we'll dial them up in our heads and think our conversations to them. Scary. How would you separate out what you want to say, and the random other thoughts you have? No more calling in sick when you aren't. The up side is that you'll never have to stay on the phone during a boring conversation anymore... of course, after a little while you won't have anymore friends. What about random sex thoughts? Trust me, you don't want to know the things that go on in my head.
 Speaking of which, another person suggested chip implants for telepathy. Every downfall I just mentioned, with no dialing. With that concept, it wouldn't just be the 50 friends, co-workers, and fellow Scout mom's in my address book that had access to my fucked up brain, but every random stranger too. On the flip-side, I don't want to be privy to the random thoughts of anyone else either. Well, I guess it could have a few benefits. Your kids would never be able to con you. You'd always know exactly where you stand in your personal relationships. Trust would become obsolete. Would lying become obsolete, as well? That would be an interesting development for humanity. What would that mean for us?
   On one hand, premeditated crimes would probably go down. Someone is sure to pick up on the thoughts of someone planning a crime, but then do we intervene and how do we do so? Do we punish people for thinking about committing a crime? No one would be able to lie to police or the courts anymore. What happens to pleading the 5th when our very thoughts can incriminate us? Forensic science would become an archaic practice. Would we need to prove guilt beyond the defendant's own thoughts of guilt or innocence?
  Potential child molesters and rapists could be found out before the crime was ever committed.
  Suicide rates would probably go down but our psych-ward populations would sky rocket. Mental illness wouldn't be able to hide any more. Would the ability to clearly read someone's thoughts help us diagnose and cure mental illness? Will we be able to deduct what makes a person tick and what is ticking off-kilter and will we develop the ability to "fix" it? If we can't cure them, will we just detect that someone isn't "right" and lock them away before they have the ability to act on their illness?
Interesting to contemplate.

Another idea presented several times is the great advancement in Artificial Intelligence and robotics... to a terrifying degree. It has been speculated that we will come so far in this advancement that the current debate of same-sex marriage will be a minor conflict of the past as people fall in love with, and petition for the right to marry their robotic companions.... What hope is there for human companionship when you can create a loved one, made to order, who is not just precisely to your specifications, but has the technology to grow with you? How many generations until humanity breeds itself out?
Follow me for a second. Initially, the people who don't create themselves a perfect spouse will have at least one of three reasons; financial, ethical, or moral. As the practice becomes more common, ethics and morals will change. I see that in a relatively short period of time the only people who wouldn't do this would be those who can't afford to, or those who don't for religious reasons. As time goes by, as with anything else, it will be less expensive to buy the technology. I hate to generalize here, but eventually it will get to the point that the people who can't afford to do so, will be the sub-par people. Meaning, those without the intellect or the drive to do well for themselves economically. Those will be our breeders. As time goes by, how long will it be before we as humans see that what we have created is better than what God did with us? How long until God becomes inferior and obsolete?
If you think the job market sucks now, think about what will happen when our "perfect" spouses assume a human life to enable a better, more authentic, connection with their spouse. Who would hire an inferior human when they have the ability to hire a "perfect" applicant?
 When we have the means to create ourselves the perfect spouse, what about then creating the perfect child? Would it be considered immoral to create a robot that is the perfect 7 year old, which can just be turned off when you have to go to work? or programmed to not need a babysitter? Could you keep it 7years old forever? When you no longer want to be a parent can you just recycle it? What if we develop the technology to allow these "children" to grow chronologically? How long would it be until we have a robot race and no more, or very few, humans?
Taking that prior thought a little further. If we grow "perfect" children chronologically, and develop them to leave the nest and strike out on their own, give them a synthetic love, will they be required to tell future companions that they are not human? I'm, in a way, drawing a comparison to those who go through gender-reassignment and the debate of moral obligation(?) in telling future companions. Some think that morally that information should be shared. Some strongly disagree. (I very much see both sides of that debate..)  But what if we're talking about not having to tell someone that you're a real person? Will we eventually get to the point when the concept of a "real person" is changed forever?

What happens when we become the endangered species? The Earth will become a happier, healthier place... I suppose it would be karma. With our technology, we have killed off so many species. It's a bitter funny, but our intellect might be the end of us.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Talk Thusday: REgressions

I've been struggling with Progressions... I don't feel very progressive these days.

The fact is... I was horribly mistaken about the extent of my relationship with the Plumber. Apparently, we are just really good friends who were briefly more affectionate than is normal. And I made assumptions. I made (I think, understandably) assumptions based on miss-intendedly misleading words and actions. That doesn't mean I wasn't heartbroken. Or embarrassed. Or a little shamed.

By nature, I am slow to trust. I am slow to open myself up to others in a way that gives them the opportunity to hurt me. Usually, I'm a fortress. That doesn't mean that I'm not affectionate with the people in my life... it just means I'm distrustful and not quick to let in newbies. I've always been that way to a certain extent. As a child, it was safer to kick someone's ass than let them see their words hurt me. It's hard to cry when you're throwing punches. Sometimes growing up sucks.. I wish it were socially acceptable for me to just kick the shit out of someone when I'm upset... somehow I know that would make me feel better. (Ok, not really... but kinda) With the Plumber, I tried to throw caution to the wind. Tried to break out of my old ways and fears and self defenses. Now I find myself wondering why.

Those things are there for a reason.

I know everyone has that little "voice in their head". Not in a schizophrenic way, just that voice... Mine speaks to me with my mother's voice.

It keeps saying, "If something seems too good to be true, it probably is.."

Why don't I listen to my mom more?

Nothing happened. We didn't fight. Just one day it was different. He says that he needs to focus on his kid and his career and he can't worry about the other things right now. He doesn't say that there won't be a "someday, down the road", but I don't ask either. He doesn't say that he doesn't feel that way about me, but again, I don't ask. He tells me I'm his best friend. That's something. Things have been a little awkward. He feels horrible for hurting me, I feel like an ass for letting myself get hurt.

I don't point out that in the little over a month he's lived with me that he's gotten his license back, paid off his fines, gotten a job, gone back to college, and that he now has his son 50% of the time.... Pointing that out seems pathetic and desperate and argumentative. It doesn't matter what his excuse is..If he doesn't want to "be with" me, then what's the point of showing him that with me he's achieved all that?

He's just as damaged as I am. Maybe a little more so. He doesn't communicate his emotions any better than I do. We're both pretty fucked up. He tries to talk to me, but his meaning is as clear as mud. I try to talk to him, but the words don't come out. So now we just pretend it isn't there.

We still have fun. I love being around him. I just wish things were still the way they were a few weeks ago.

I don't know if it's stress or the fact that it's hard to remember to take your birth control when you're not having sex... but I've had my period twice this month. I feel like my uterus is weeping for my broken heart.

I've never met anyone so perfect for me. We're enough alike to always be entertained, but different enough to never get boring. We're so sexually compatible that it scares me I'll never find that again. Good sex is still good, but when it's great... Ohhh my god, it's amazing.

I don't know where I am... I'm this big ball of confused disillusionment, self-pity, dysfunctional wanting, and bitterness. But, as we all know,

This too shall pass.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

The Battle In Council Rock...

Some people think that I am one of those parents that shelter my child a little too much. Of course, being the one in question, I disagree. I try very hard to evaluate what my child is ready for and give him age/maturity appropriate information. It's not always an easy call. That said, he is 9... with Asperger's... so maturity wise, he is often more like a 7 year old, at best.

Today I read an article about the issues the Council Rock School District is having with the group PARE. Parents Active in Responsible Education is a group fighting the school district on the issue of the use of R-rated movies in high school classrooms.

Sure, initially, I was like... ok.. my kid can't see it in a theater without me, but he can see it at school?? Does this make sense? But then I investigated a little further.

The School District has a section on its website where you can view the entire list of 52 R-rated movies approved by the school district, see which class it will be used in, more specifically which teacher requested the use of it. For the teen to be able to see it, a parent or guardian MUST SIGN A PERMISSION SLIP.

PARE is saying that parents are bullied into signing the slip out of fear of embarrassing their children or kids are forging their signatures. Funny, but I don't remember parents being afraid to pull their Middle Schoolers out of sex ed when I was a kid or in high school when certain kids had to leave class when we talked about the theory of evolution.. Yeah, they were embarrassed, but their parents didn't give a crap.

The bottom line is, if you don't want your kid to see the movie, don't sign the paper. Call the school. Make sure the school knows how you feel. Don't block the other kids' chance at getting the message.

Viewing the list, there were several movies on it that I watched in my high school. I think that they were effective tools for giving concrete examples of the things that were taught in the text books. In psychology, we had to watch The Breakfast Club and do a report on social cliques and status in school. In that same class, we also had to watch Harold and Maude, which is not R-rated, and it disturbed me way more than the R-rated films. While we didn't watch it in school, we got extra credit in history if we went and saw Schindler's List, cuz yes, I'm that old. Our theater had a special viewing just for the high school kids.

There are several major advantages to using movies to aid education. One, study after study has proven that not everyone learns the same. Some kids just can't sit down with a book of Shakespeare, read it, and retain it. Two, there is a benefit to giving the pupils a visual scenario to apply to the text. Sometimes it takes a dramatization to make the jump and impact the lesson in the student's mind. Hell, they still use dramatizations on me at work when they make me watch that ethics crap and take tests on it. If they let me watch a real movie, instead of their crappy, campy, low-budget drivel... I might pay more attention.. even look forward to doing my education requirements.

This year the Council Rock School District cut some 20+ movies from their approved list. One of those movies was Kids. This makes me sad. I think this is an important movie that all kids should see, starting before high school. It's a movie about a teen whose number one goal is to devirginize as many girls as possible... one problem.. he has HIV. One girl who discovers that she contracted the virus from him tries desperately to warn his next victim.

What better way to teach young horny kids that you can't be too careful? That you can't trust every cute guy/girl with a pretty smile? And that people rarely do the right thing? I was an adult when I saw that movie.. and it still made an impact.

I was sad to see that Heathers wasn't on the list. I think every teen should see that movie. What better way to see what the evils of trying to fit in can bring.. as well as how easily a prank can get out of control?

Several years ago, I got in big trouble by my boyfriend at the time because I let his 12 year old daughter watch 8mm. Ok.. didn't "let" her watch it... highly encouraged and sat with her to watch it. This was a very naive girl who desperately wanted to be a model and didn't understand why her dad thought she was too young and didn't want her to have anything to do with it. After that movie, she understood.. still wanted to do it.. but understood. I, however, was in the dog house.

I just think it's important to remember that you can't shelter your child forever. In the right context, and the right environment, movies can have a great impact and can be a great teaching tool. I always use television as a learning tool, whether it's watching Man, Woman, Wild and telling my son you're not really dying of thirst unless you're willing to drink your own pee, or that starving to death means you'd eat a bug or a snake, or watching The World's Strictest Parents and showing him who he doesn't want to grow up to be or how bad he could really have it at home. Even Extreme Makeover: Home Edition shows him how good it feels to do something for someone else. I often use the news to show him things like "this is why we don't talk to strangers", "this is why we wear seatbelts", "this is why we never drink and drive", "this is why we don't mess with fire", or "guns".... The opportunity for teaching a valuable lesson is EVERYWHERE. It makes me sad to see people fighting such a valuable tool.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Oregon 3rd BABY!!!!

I wonder if Boise St cried a little this morning???


I smell ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSES!!!!



I Love My Ducks (Return of the Quack) - Supwitchugirl

282,298 views in 2 DAYS!!!! I'm not the only one who loves her Ducks!!!!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

The ENTIRE Pew Forum Religion Survey

Minus the demographic survey questions.
DON'T GOOGLE!!!!
The answers are in the "comments" section.

1. Who is the vice president of the United States?

2. Which political party has the majority in the US House of Representatives?
a. Republicans
b. Democrats

3. True of False? Lasers work by focusing sound waves?

4. True of False? Antibiotics will kill viruses as well as bacteria?

5. Which of the following was the name of a series of government programs passed while Franklin D Roosevelt was President?
a. The New Deal
b. The Square Deal
c. The Great Society

6. Which movement did Susan B. Anthony lead? The movement to...
a. Abolish slavery
b. Give women the right to vote
c. Prohibit alcohol

7. Who wrote Moby Dick?
a. Edith Wharton
b. Nathaniel Hawthorne
c. Herman Melville
d. Stephen King

8. What day does the Jewish Sabbath begin?
a. Friday
b. Saturday
c. Sunday

9. Is Ramadan.....
a. The Hindu festival of lights
b. The Jewish day of atonement
c. The Islamic holy month

10. Do you happen to know which of these is the king of gods in Greek mythology?
a. Mars
b. Zeus
c. Apollo

11. Do you happen to know the name of the holy book for Islam?

12. Which of these religions aims at nirvana, a state of being free from suffering?
a. Islam
b. Hinduism
c. Buddhism

13. Which religion are Vishnu and Shiva central figures?
a. Islam
b. Taoism
c. Hinduism
d. Buddhism

14. Is an atheist someone who BELIEVES in God, someone who DOES NOT believe in God, or someone who is UNSURE whether God exists?

15. Is an agnostic someone who BELIEVES in God, someone who DOES NOT believe in God, or someone who is UNSURE whether God exists?

16. What is the first book of the Bible?

17. What are the first four books of the New Testament of the Bible, that is the Four Gospels?

18. Where, according to the Bible, was Jesus born?
a. Jerusalem
b. Nazereth
c. Bethleham
d. Jericho

19. When was the Mormon religion founded?
a. Before the year 1200 AD
b. Between 1200 and 1800
c. Sometime after 1800

20. The Book of Mormon tells the story of Jesus Christ appearing to people in what area of the world?
a. The Middle East
b. The Americas
c. Asia

21. Which of the following best describes Cathoic teaching about the bread and wine used for communion?
a. The bread and wine are symbols of the body and blood of Jesus Christ.
b. The bread and wine actually become the body and blood of Jesus Christ.

22. Which one of these religious groups traditionally teaches that salvation comes through faith alone?
a. Protestants
b. Catholics
c. Both
d. Neither

23. Which of these is NOT one of the Ten Commandments?
a. Keep the Sabbath Day holy.
b. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
c. Do not steal
d. Do not commit adultry

24. Which figure is most associated with remaining obedient to God despite suffering?
a. Moses
b. Elijah
c. Job
d. Abraham

Which figure is most associated with leading the exodus from Egypt?
a. Moses
b. Elijah
c. Job
d. Abraham

Which figure is most associated with willingness to sacrifice his son for God?
a. Moses
b. Elijah
c. Job
d. Abraham

25. Mother Theresa was...
a. Jewish
b. Catholic
c. Buddhist
d. Mormon
e. Hindu

The Dali Lama is....
a. Jewish
b. Catholic
c. Buddhist
d. Mormon
e. Hindu

Joseph Smith was....
a. Jewish
b. Catholic
c. Buddhist
d. Mormon
e. Hindu

Maimonides was....
a. Jewish
b. Catholic
c. Buddhist
d. Mormon
e. Hindu

26. Which of the following statements best describes what the US Constitution says about religion?
a. Christianity should be given special emphasis by government
b. The government shall neither establish a religion or interfere with the practice of religion
c.  The constitution doesn't say anything one way or the other about religion.

27. According to rulings by the US Supreme Court, does a teacher have the right to lead a class in prayer?  
Yes or No
Does a teacher have the right to read from the Bible as an example of literature?
Yes or No
Does a teacher have the right to offer a class teaching comparative world religions?  
Yes or No

28. Do you happen to know what religion most people in India consider themselves?
a. Christian
b. Muslim
c. Buddhist
d. Hindu

Do you happen to know what religion most people in Indonesia consider themselves?
a. Christian
b. Muslim
c. Buddhist
d. Hindu

Do you happen to know what religion most people in Pakistan consider themselves?
a. Christian
b. Muslim
c. Buddhist
d. Hindu

29. What was the name of the person whose writings and actions inspired the Protestant Reformation?
a. Thomas Aquinas
b. Martin Luther
c. John Wesley

30. Which of these people developed the theory of evolution by natural selection?
a. Sigmund Freud
b. Clarence Darrow
c. Charles Darwin

31. Which of these court trials focused on whether evolution could be taught in public schools?
a. The Salem witch trials
b. Brown vs The Board of Education
c. The Scopes Trial

32. Which of these preachers participated in the period of religious activity known as the First Great Awakening?
a. Jonathan Edwards
b. Charles Finney
c. Billy Graham


***This study was conducted by the Pew Forum. These questions were extracted from the actual phone script used in the study. I have extracted and eliminated only demographic-type questions and slightly reformatted the the script into a more readable layout. ***

I will post the answers to the "comments" section of this blog in the next few hours.

I think the most important information this study yields is that though we are a nation of many beliefs, very few of us have taken the time to learn what beliefs our neighbors and friends hold dear. I would hope that the outcome is that people are encouraged to learn more. In the (maybe not so) famous worlds of KRS-1...
Knowledge is King!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Canadian Judge Sides With Prostitutes.....

"Key provisions of Canada's prostitution law were struck down Tuesday by an Ontario judge who said they endangered the people they were meant to protect." ~CNN story.

Currently, in Canada, it's not illegal to earn money and file taxes as a sex worker, it's just illegal to do what you're being paid for. The main argument in the case seems to have been that this prevents sex workers from opening an establishment to work out of, therefore forces sex workers into more dangerous situations on the streets.

The judge found that this was an infringement of the sex workers' constitutional rights. In 30 days, within the province of Ontario, this will no longer be illegal. The Canadian Supreme Court is now evaluating whether they will block it, or allow it for the entire country.

My personal view on prostitution? Really, I'm on the fence. I initially think that it's not a good thing. I think that a lot of women are sucked into a demeaning, abusive, unsafe lifestyle. They become trapped by their addictions and have a hard time getting out. Yes, this is stereotyping. Yes, this is based on our current situation of prostitution being illegal in the majority of the US and women conducting their business in dirty alleys, with nasty pimps who purposefully keep them addicted to drugs. Yes, I know this is not always the situation.... maybe not even the total norm. This is my initial thought when the issue of prostitution is brought up.

On further review, my thoughts differ a bit. First, it's called "the oldest profession in the world" for a reason. Who am I to take away the one sure-fire way any woman has to put a roof over her head and food in her belly? If nothing else, a man can almost always fall back on hard physical labor... Women are not always capable of doing the same labors as a man.

Then, you have to consider, some women like it. I like sex. Superficially, it doesn't seem like a bad thing to get paid for doing what you love. No Mom, that doesn't mean I would do it... I guess I kind of view it as I do abortion... It might not be right for me, but who am I to say what's right for someone else?

I've had a great many discussions with Sandra on this issue since she moved to Australia where prostitution is legal. Their system seems pretty responsible and functional.

Ibelieve you are required to be a member of the sex worker's union. You have to go in for regular STD testing. I believe you have to work for an establishment (not on the streets). You have to pay taxes. And, I could totally be wrong about this one, but I think that condoms are not optional. I'm sure that there are many more rules and regulations, but those are the ones that obviously impressed me the most. (Sandra, feel free to correct me or fill in blanks. Please.)

I think a system like this is great. One, I think the likelihood of abuse and entrapment is greatly decreased. I think an environment such as this provides for the women who WANT to be in that profession and makes it harder for women who don't. Two, it is a great attempt to protect both the workers and the clients from disease.... Sure, you will probably always have alley hookers who are working for their next fix, but it gives people a healthy option.

I don't know that I had totally sorted my thoughts out on this matter until today.. One of the great/annoying things about CNN's articles is that the average moron can post their thoughts and opinions on the articles... Sometimes it takes hearing what those idiots have to say, before you can solidify your own viewpoint.

  *trollthis 
there you go....easier access to ugly hookers...isn't that what every country really needs?  ~ ..... if you were a proprietor of a brothel, wouldn't you want the cream of the crop? Well, if I were to buy a little fun, I'd go to the place with the pretty hookers.
  *edrury101
Prostitution creates an economic imbalance in out society just like gambling and extreme drug abuse. -?? How does that even make sense?

*edrury101
Men love women. Prostitution is an easy sell. Too easy in fact. A man spending money for a prostitute has less money to feed his kids and pay his mortgage.  - WOW... I find this a lot like telling your 5 year old, "it's not your fault you stole that candy bar, the store shouldn't have put it there... too much temptation." or "Your Honor, it's not my fault I raped that girl... you should have seen what she was wearing..." 
On another note, so the moron spent his mortgage money on a piece of ass and can't pay his bills, BUT THE PROSTITUTE CAN... and her kids are eating steak tonight! 
People who are irresponsible with their money will blow it regardless of whether or not it's on a hooker, crack, or a new Harley - get real! The real issue isn't the immoral acts of the sex workers, it's the immoral, irresponsible act of the John in this idiot's scenario. Hmmmm? Feed my kids or buy a blow job? If you're asking yourself THAT question, you have way more serious issues. Put the blame where it belongs. And truly, someone like that? It doesn't matter if prostitution is legalized... No one would chose a blow job over feeding their child just because getting said blow job is now decriminalized!


Tuesday, September 28, 2010

A Little Disappointed.......

I know I've stated before that I was a huge fan of President Clinton. A lot of people had a problem with him because he lied about his extramarital affair... I, personally had no problem with his lie, simply because I didn't think that The People, nor the government, had any right to question him about it.

Today, Obama disappointed me. As he addressed an audience in New Mexico, a woman asked him about his Christian faith. Apparently, though the President has stated many times that he his Christian, about a third of Americans think he is secretly Muslim. I find it insulting that he should have to attest to his faith at all. Whose business is it? This just infuriates me.

I hope in 20 years it comes out that he is Muslim. How many times should he feel obligated to answer this question? It's ridiculous and inconsequential.

Go Obama... Don't bend to the ignorance... I hope he is lying.. he would have every right!

EXTRA EXTRA.... READ ALL ABOUT IT!!!!

AMERICANS SUCK AT RELIGION....

A new study finds that Americans, from one of the most religiously diverse countries in the world, apparently don't know crap about religion...

I am thrilled to find that the people who scored the highest..... wanna guess??? Atheists and agnostics!!! Jews and Mormons followed closely...

"Only eight of the 3,412 survey respondents got all 32 questions right. Six got them all wrong."

 On CNN's 10 question segment... I got one question wrong.... it was a head slapper, "Duh"... how did you do??? Ohhhhh maybe I can find the actual 32 question quiz.....

The Pew Forum conducted this study, and you can go there to take a larger segment on the quiz. Unfortunately, when I tried, the site was having some technical difficulties...

Give it a try, let me know how you did and what you think about it.

Coffee and CNN.com

These days, I get the kid off to school and browse CNN, enjoying my coffee... looking for something that moves or inspires me. In some nerdy way, I am most entertained by my blogs on religion, politics, or current news items. This is nothing new for me. In the years following high school, I would spend my weekends at the radio station, babysitting satellite feeds or syndicated programs, surrounded by encyclopedias and writing letters to congressmen and newspapers that I never got around to sending. (Buying stamps is a congenital allergy) I am still the same person, the only thing that has changed is the technology. It's so much easier to investigate things via the internet, and now I no longer have to worry about an envelope or stamps... what hasn't changed is the odds that anyone but my mom will read my work.... (I know that's not entirely true, there are a few of you!) (Thank you!)

Yesterday, I wrote about 2nd Amendment rights.... Today I read about a young 9-months-pregnant, elementary-school nurse who was stabbed over 20 times with a butcher knife and managed to crawl to her mom's front porch before she died. They later discovered that her boyfriend had been shot and killed.... Pretty sick and superficially it would seem that the killer chose to make her death a little more personal by opting for the knife when a gun was readily available... The impersonal shooting the boyfriend indicates two things: 1, either the killer just needed to get him out of the way, or 2, the killer couldn't find pleasure in his death.

Sure we've had our Manson's... They are not the norm though. Generally, people are killed by people they know. Scary. The news was trying to say, "She couldn't have had enemies, she was an elementary school nurse...." Yeah, like that matters. My guess is going to be that the killer is female, probably one of the boyfriend's ex's... Generally speaking, a man's crime of passion is in the moment. He walks in and sees his woman in bed with another man and he kills the man, maybe both of them.. Almost never is the woman his one and only target. A woman feels spurned and commits a crime of passion..... She coddles it for awhile.. incubates it into a lustful rage. I think woman are more methodical in their revenge. We'll wait for the right moment... This person waited at least 9 months. A man wouldn't do that. But we'll see..... Though the odds are against it, this could just be a random loon who hates pregnant women.

On another note.. Johnny Knoxville got married..... Poor woman.. I couldn't even imagine..

An actors guild strike in New Zealand could hurt Peter Jackson's The Hobbit... Yes, that's right THE HOBBIT... **happy dance** He's apparently pretty pissed off and feels he's done a lot to help his homeland, and has threatened to take filming to Europe if they don't pull their heads from their asses.... THE HOBBIT!!!! I'm so excited... though the article I read states that this is NOT an entirely done deal. *fingers crossed*

Monday, September 27, 2010

Second Amendment Rights

"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed." The Second Amendment of the United States Constitution's Bill of Rights.

Gun control has long been a disputed topic of the American people. This is another one of those issues that I believe the Federal Supreme Court and Congress should make some all-inclusive decisions on. It makes no sense at all for gun laws to change depending on which state you're in. Since the US Constitution allows for the "right to bear arms" and Congress opted to include it in the Rights from Day 1 and laid pen to it, they too should set the laws to regulate ownership and use. Another point which causes me to argue the wisdom of a Republic.

Objectively, you can look at this Amendment two ways. One, our Founding Fathers and the Congress that wrote the Bill of Rights felt strongly that the American People have the right to own guns. They allowed for it. Therefore, we have the right, end of story.
TWO, this was clearly written in the "militia" mindset. At that point in history, we had no Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, or Coast Guard. (yes, many forget the Coast Guard) Our national security and independence relied solely on the average citizen taking his rifle down from the wall and staking his life on something he believed in. If it weren't for our Minutemen, we would still be singing "God Save the Queen"....
....but, many would argue, times have changed. We do have the Armed Forces. We no longer rely on a militia-type situation. If all of our troops were over seas, we have the back up of the National Guard or Reserve forces, whose primary objective is securing peace and security within our borders.
There is one concept that I think is often overlooked or not realized. One of the objectives our Founding Fathers had in mind when ensuring our right to posses and bear arms was this... A government who entrusts its citizens with the means to fight back, is less likely to become tyrannical. Now... what is the truth or logic of that? What would happen if the citizens of Oregon banded together and raised arms against the Federal Government? If Washington, Oregon, Idaho, and Montana did? Hell the whole West Coast? The Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, and Coast Guard would come and SHUT US DOWN! Not very realistic, but a nice gesture. Kind of like the parent whose 5 year old threatens to run away and simply says "there's your suitcase, there's the door... you can go when you want..".... but we all know it's never going to happen.

While we can certainly say that civilian ownership of firearms not only secured our independence from Britain, but preserved that independence during the War of 1812 and we can look at other countries throughout history and see how it benefited them, ie. the Swiss were able to turn away the Nazi's while so many of their neighbors were easily consumed.... there is a legitimate argument that, in our current state of society, firearms too easily fall into the hands of criminals and murderers.

* Last week (ish), Maryland, a man upset by his mother's deteriorating health, took out a gun and shot the doctor. Then he locked himself in his mother's hospital room, shot her and then himself.

* Last weekend, Oregon, a man, apparently upset by his impending divorce, shot his daughters, age 7 and 9, then himself.

*Last Thursday, Washington, Mom goes crazy and kills 3 family members then herself.

*Yesterday, Florida, a man shot his ex-wife, her 5 children (one survived) and then himself. He did spare the 2 children that were his.

*Yesterday, Florida, an elderly man, disgruntled over teens skateboarding in the park, pulled out a gun and shot the man who came forward to defend the  right of the teens to be in the park.

But we all know that guns don't make crazy parents. I think a parent who is capable of killing their children will do so with or without a gun. Mentally ill moms have been drowning their children in bathtubs, putting babies in the microwave, throwing them down embankments, or beating them to death long before Diane Downs invented her Bushy-Haired Stranger.

So what is the answer? Outlaw civilian ownership of firearms? Will that really solve the problem? People who have legally registered weapons don't TEND to be the people who commit gun crimes. Will outlawing guns get illegally owned guns off the streets and out of the hands of criminals? ...I tend to think not.

Perhaps a bit of the answer is to start with uniformed gun laws. In Florida, they have a "Stand Your Ground" law. It's legal to defend yourself or your home with lethal force. (I haven't read the law... and I'm not sure how it truly differs from any other reasonable 'self-defense type' law.) The man in Florida who shot the man defending the teen skateboarders, in view of many witnesses (including the deceased man's 8 year old daughter) didn't go to jail, was not arrested, no charges have been filed. Though he was not on his property at the time of the shooting, was not reported to be in physical danger himself, and there are conflicting stories that he 1- had the gun on him, then that he 2- went back into his house for the gun.... People are speculating that this "Stand Your Ground" law will be his defense. (There are also uncited reports that the shooter is a retired law enforcement officer.)

I wouldn't be opposed, AT ALL, to every firearm having to be registered. Currently, only hand guns have that requirement. This doesn't make sense to me. All guns have the potential to be used in a crime. Register them all. If you're an upstanding citizen, you shouldn't have a problem with this.

During production, require the manufacturers to test and provide forensic fingerprints of each weapon's rifling and whatnot. Require gun owners to reregister their weapons every few years, including a test fire and updated forensic fingerprinting.

Make gun modification illegal or place strict policies on it. If you change out a gun's barrel, it has to be reregistered. If you fail to comply, you lose your right to "bear arms".

Require ammunition manufactures to develop a tracking system for their munitions. I'm not sure how you would deal with people who make and reload their own ammunition (it's rather fun, cheaper, and not a bad hobby....)

Require individuals who own firearms to show proof of reasonable, safe, responsible gun storage.

These are just some ideas.. If I can come up with this off the top of my head... just think what the professionals could come up with if they TRIED!

The bottom line is this... Scumbags who want guns will always be able to get them. You can't undo 200+ years of guns being a part of our society. You can't erase them. They will always be here. The best way, I think, to combat the problem is to make them all traceable, put away the scumbags and get those guns off the streets. But still, if cocaine and heroin and marijuana can be snuck across our borders, illegal weapons will come with them....

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Mom & Daughter Day!!

Mom and I spent an awesome hour at Area 51 getting inked. Now I'm jonesing. I think we should make this an annual event. hehehe The only thing I'm kind of kicking myself in the butt for is the location. I didn't think about having to wash and lotion it three times a day... and the middle of the back isn't the easiest place to reach..

Rusty was so great. I don't think I'd ever go to anyone else. When I explained what else I wanted done with this tat, Rusty got excited and thought it was a great concept. He had excellent ideas on how to improve my ideas. Plus he said $50 would reink my forearm and he seems to think that he can cover my monkey..... I'm thinking a green man maybe.... he said it needs to be covered with color.




I wanted this encircled with a sun.... I was thinking something like a Godsmack sun. Black and tribal. A friend had drawn up her idea, and instead of a full sun, she just had the flames coming out around it... Rusty suggested that we do it in color- red, orange, yellow.. sort of emanating from the knot work and it's shading. I don't really know what he means... but all of his suggestions have been excellent so far.. In the middle of the knot, I was Burp's birth sigh, Leo and outside the flames the symbols for Christianity, Judaism, Islam, and Hinduism. (I kinda wanted the religious symbols- one on the bottom of each foot and the palms of my hands... and an Eye of Ra on the back of my head.... but ouch and plus... I'm not shaving my head!)

The sun represents the male aspect of God, the knot is the triple Goddess aspect. The snake eating it's tail represents the continuity of eternal life through rebirth. It seems fitting to surround that with the 4 major interpretations of God.


Mom was a trooper. I don't think I'd like a tat on my foot... One, I hate my feet and try not to show them much anyway.... but two.. OUCHIES!!! She was pretty stoic though.

I love tiger lilies...

We finished up our afternoon together with yummy Mongolian Grill.... It was a very nice time... I wish we got to do stuff like that more often.

I love you mom. and really, really... you are the bestest!

I think we should go get pierced together!

Friday, September 24, 2010

The Inner Workings Of Me... and a funny

So.. I think if people could hear the inner workings of my mind, their brains would explode... The only time I seem to have a rational progression of thoughts is when I'm writing, or in an extreme rage. That's when I'm focused. The rest of the time, my thoughts are snowball of random thoughts, worries, and second-guesses. Trust me, I hate it.. I'd change it if I could.. sometimes, the progression is so quick that I have a hard time getting my thoughts out in conversation. One thought leads to another. I wonder if I understood the other person's meaning. Will my answer be understood? Am I saying this right? Am I going to offend? Is this really what I mean? What were we talking about?

Every morning when I take my birth control... I remember a similar morning a few months ago when I'd stayed the night at my mom's.

She saw me taking my birth control and asked the simple question, "Is it working for you?"

My first thought.. "Well, I'm not pregnant."
Then, "Why would I still be taking it if I were pregnant." "You can't 'undo' it." "She doesn't think that I wouldn't tell her if I were pregnant, does she?" "Is she trying to say that she thinks I shouldn't be having sex, is she?" "No, she'd never think that. I have a progressive mother." "If anything, she'd tell me I need to have MORE." "Hell, I'd love to have more..." "More would be nice." "I don't think you can ever have too much sex." "Well, maybe too much at once...but not in general."

Then I realize my mom is still looking at me expectantly and I've been looking at her like a confused puppy dog. I look at my birth control, then back at her... and it clicks.... she's talking about my complexion.

Duh!

"Uhhh, yeah.... seems to be, I guess."

Thursday, September 23, 2010

J-Lo On Idol....

At first I was like... ugggggg but, really I guess she's not a bad choice. Much better than Howard Stern, by far.. That man makes me ill.

She promises to not be a diva... Who cares... to the idiot that was like "I hear she only likes yellow M&M's, who's going to pick them out?" Duh... You can order just yellow ones you moron... You can order yellow ones that say "We worship J-Lo" if you really want..

Just sayin'...

It'll be an interesting season... losing Simon. I'm not that heartbroken over losing Ellen... but to lose two will make things interesting.

Can't wait for the season to start!!

Lucifer Drama

I realize that you all might be sick of hearing about this already, but blogging has long been a source of therapy for me. It helps me to get it off my chest, gives me the sense that I've said my piece, and often helps me work out my frustrations.

So rewind to Saturday.
The Plumber worked in the morning and had the expectation that he would get Gemini in the afternoon. When afternoon came, Lucifer was being a snatch and after several nasty text back and forth, the Plumber said, "Have it your way, you must enjoy talking to the police."

After about 15 minutes of silence, she said he could go pick up Gemini. We had a great evening of Chinese food and rented movies. The next morning Gemini went to work with his Dad and not long after they returned, I left to go pick up Burp in Florence.

About an hour into my drive, I got a nasty text from Lucifer... "I told you to stay out of my way. If you think he's ever going to love you.. hahaha that's funny cuz he still hasn't gotten over me!"

I had pulled over to read the text and was like...... "WTF?" I sat there for a moment... Trying to figure out what the hell she meant. I texted the Plumber.. His response was, "she's being a bitch, ignore her.."

I drove on to my mom's house.... but of course, the closer I got to the house, the more angry I got. First, "I told you to stay out of my way"???? I'm not sure where or when she imagined that conversation took place. But mostly, I was angry that what ever argument she and the Plumber had gotten into, she felt the need to drag me into it. We had made that agreement. As far as he and Lucifer were concerned, I'd stay out of it... and she'd stay out of my relationship with the Plumber. Seemed fair to me.

I got to my mom's house and no one was home... I let myself in, went through the house to the porch, sat and smoked and stewed and contemplated.
Finally, I texted her back.
"I'm not sure what you imagine I've done to "get in your way", but I'm not playing your games." Not too bad.. No threats. No swearing. Plain and simple and firm. No way in hell I'm starting this relationship with letting her think she can push me around and send me shitty texts whenever she gets a bee up her snatch.
Her response.... "Don't talk to me."

I'm not sure why...... other than the fact that her response was completely juvenile, but this sent me into a near-psychotic rage. My mom came home at this point. And I was shaking with rage. I'm not sure, but I think it's been a long time since my mom has seen me that mad.

I controlled myself though. As badly as I wanted to text her back and set her straight. I didn't. I didn't say a word.

I got home and found out that she'd apparently only seen that "Hope you like talking to the police" comment that afternoon and, for whatever reason, thought that was my influence. Sure, I've thought it a million times, but never said it.... as it wasn't my place....I don't offer my opinion unless asked, and he never asked what I thought he should do if she denied him his visitation.

The next day, he had a decent conversation with her. She told him that she'd said some really mean things to me and kinda felt bad. Yay for her.

So fast forward to last night. Around 9 pm he gets a call from her that she has no where to stay, and she wants him to take Gemini, but he'll have to drive him to school in the morning. Only HIM.
The Plumber was like, "I can't do that, I have to work." She swore and hung up on him.

I would have been more than happy to not only have Gemini for the night, but to take him to school in the morning, but I told the Plumber if she called back.. he could offer her two solutions..... 1) Gemini could spend the night and I'd drive him to school in the morning.. or 2) Gemini could spend the night and she could sleep in her car in the parking lot and SHE could take him to school in the morning.

It's only fair and rational to give her options.

Unfortunately, she never called back. When the Plumber tried to call her, it rang once and she hung it up.

I'd much prefer to have Gemini here than wonder if he did his homework, if he had dinner, where he slept for the night, and whether or not he had clean clothes for school in the morning.

As much as she hates me... for whatever reason... shouldn't making sure her son is taken care of come first? How selfish can you be?

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Irony????

Just as I finished up my last post... I got a text.

Dear God,

This is my girl, my friend and sister, whom I love and this is my prayer for her. Help her live her life to the fullest. Please promote her and cause her to excel above her expectations. Help her to shine in the darkest places where it is impossible to love. Protect her at all times, lift her up when she needs you the most and let her know when she walks with you. She will always be safe.

I love you girl. Now you're on the clock. In nine minutes something will make you happy. But you have to tell nine sisters you love them, including me. Get going girl! Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you are not willing to move yours.

Truly Blessed.

......................... Have I ever mentioned that I'm superstitious? Not in the "I have to send this or my life will suck.." way, but in the "I can't send this or my life will suck" way. I KNOW!!! I probably don't make any sense.

I don't believe in tempting the Fates. I don't make wishes. I don't like to voice my hopes or fears - it might jinx the one and give life to the other. And I DON'T send on chain letters or texts. The odds are, something might make me happy anyway... in the next 9 minutes? who knows... but to ask for more than whatever might be planned for me seems like I'm pushing it. It's like praying that you get that job, or that he likes your new hair do, or that you get pregnant, or that you aced that test... If it's going to happen, it'll happen... not based on how much you wish, hope, or pray and to ask for more is selfish.

As far as this text goes. The message is nice and sweet and it would feel good to know that someone had that wish for me.... if there wasn't a "forward this now and your dreams will come true" attached to it.

So Laine, thank you for the texty hug.... but I'm going to ignore this... with all the rest that I get.. and know that if it's meant to be, it will be...

Blind faith, again.

Talk Thursday: Equinox

I thought I was pagan for awhile. I simply knew that I could no longer call myself Christian, and lacked a better term. I studied it a bit, but never considered myself a witch or a shaman, or any of the other things, but I believe in the power of the mind and meditation, herbal healing, and I've always felt God in nature... I thought I'd finally found my way.

At some point, I realized that though I no longer believed that The Bible was the Divine Word, it's impossible to shake off your roots. There was a major war going on in my soul. I still believed in God. I still believed that God is good. I just don't believe that Christianity has the whole and complete Truth. In my opinion, it offers several interpretations of a partial Truth.

I haven't had Eucharist in some 16 years, I sometimes have panic attacks about it- even though I really don't believe in it.

When my son was born, I had major anxiety about whether or not to have him Christened.

I believe that God knows what's in my heart; He knows my needs, my fears, my joys, and my dreams. I don't believe that prayer is necessary.... but it took me a long time to realize that this doesn't mean I can't talk to God. For a long time I felt like I was giving into the programing of my youth. I felt hypocritical. .. like if I don't believe in the tenants of the faith- I shouldn't uphold the practices. Then I realized, that's just retarded... I'm pretty certain anyone with faith talks to God.

I get upset when people accuse me of having abandoned God. I guess that I look at it as my faith in God is so strong, I don't need to have all the answers... I don't have to believe that the Bible is 100% actual and factual. I can believe in science and God at the same time. I can be wrong and know that my God will still love and forgive me. Some accuse me of having abandoned God, but don't know their religion well enough to debate the issue with me so I can explain the things in THEIR faith that cause me to believe the way that I do.... It's frustrating when they admit that they don't know the Bible as well as I do, so they can't have this conversation... But I've abandoned God.

Most people cannot grasp that instead of believing "because the Bible told me so", I believe because I feel the overwhelming love of God in my soul and I have blind faith in that love. I can believe in God with a logical mind and not be afraid to say, "That doesn't make sense, I don't believe it." That doesn't contradict my faith. That doesn't lessen my faith. In my mind, it means I'm secure in my faith, and, in fact, strengthens it. I have a broader acceptance of God... I don't limit myself to one flavor of God. I think all the religions offer something beautiful and insightful on their path to God.... (Ok... except Scientology... but in truth.... I really can't consider them a religion.. which I know isn't fair..."Judge not, least ye be judged.." but I still haven't wrapped my brain around those people.)

As God said to Moses, "Ehyeh asher ehyeh"

I am who I am.

And I know that He understands me.... after all, He made me this way.. Right?


I hear His voice on the wind.
I feel His touch in the rain.
I feel His caress as the sun warms my skin.

God is with me and I am His to judge. Not yours.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The DREAM Act....

The vote today was not in favor of moving forward with the Defense Authorization Act. The reason, The DREAM Act. I was so horribly ignorant in agreeing that this didn't belong in the DoD Act. I didn't know what it really was and simply believed the Republicans when they said it didn't belong.

Before the vote they offered an all-inclusive agreement. Democrats strike The Dream Act from the DoD and include language that would prohibit anything regarding immigration from ever being included in DoD, and Republicans would unanimously vote in favor of bringing the DoD to the table.

I was a little appalled that Democrats turned them down. The vote happened and Democrats did not get the number of votes they needed. In the statements afterward, I learned what The Dream Act really was.

The Dream Act applies to the children of illegal immigrants. This Act would give these children, brought to and raised in our country illegally, an avenue to have legal immigrant status. It does not grant them citizenship, it simply gives them a course to follow.

We've, as a nation, already decided not to punish these children for their parent's crimes. We give them the same access to education and health care that we give the children who are here legally. Unfortunately, we abandon these children when they reach adulthood. They cannot legally work, get driver's licenses, receive financial aid, or SERVE IN OUR MILITARY.

The DREAM Act offers a reasonable solution. It says if you were illegally brought to this country as a child, have lived here for at least 5 years, have graduated high school, and have a clean criminal record... you have two ways to get a Green Card. Not citizenship, A GREEN CARD. 1. Attend 2 years of college. 2. Join the military for 2 years.

To me, this is completely fair and a good move. So many young adults who were brought here and remain here illegally would love a chance to do either of these things and currently can't. This is a great way of saying, "Show us how bad you want it. Show us that you want to be legit, productive citizens." Once they have their Green Cards then they have a legal avenue to pursue citizenship.

The majority of the people that this Act would apply to have lived in the US for the majority of their lives. They view this as their home, and their country. Could you imagine if you'd been brought to the US as a baby, and at 18 told that you have to go back to China, India, Bolivia, or some other completely foreign place that you don't remember? You might not know the language or the customs. How terrifying.

The DREAM Act is something that NEEDS to happen. This shouldn't be a dream at all.

Is "Obtusity" A Word?

IT IS!!!

I don't normally watch C-SPAN.... Today is such an important day though.. Unfortunately, I've come away even more frustrated with Republicans. The upside, I'm very impressed with the Independent Sen. Joe Lieberman. Of course, I only have about 6 minutes worth of speaking to base my opinion on, but this country would run so much more smoothly if all Senators could be so rational and plain spoken.

Today's mission in the Senate? Democrats want to move forward and start working on the Defense Authorization Act... Republicans want to stall this process until the schematics are worked out.

To be fair, yes, I'm a democrat. Does that mean I always vote party? No. I try my best to vote my conscience; be it Dem, Rep, or Independent... Whether it's with my party or against it. I vote for who or what I feel is right and I'm not so obtuse as to think that my party is always right... (Sorry Grandma, but yes, at times you are very obtuse.)

The Defense Authorization Act (DoD) is nothing new. They have passed one every year for the last 50-something years. This is basically the budget and plan that pays not just for our military supplies and operations around the world, but military family allowances, benefits, and programs. At this time, there are three Amendments that are being attached to this Act. 1) The repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," 2) The Dream Act, and 3) an Amendment that would allow military hospitals to provide abortion services.

The Republicans are trying to delay the working on this Act because they don't agree with the Amendments. My understanding, based on what was debated today, is that they will get their time to debate and vote on these Amendments once they agree to begin working on the DoD.

The biggest argument is in regards to "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". Apparently, the Pentagon is working on a study as how to best implement the changes that Congress has yet to agree upon, but the Republicans in the Senate don't want to vote to even work on this bill until that study is back....... Perhaps I'm being obtuse, but .... how can a study properly be conducted when the parameters of change haven't even been laid???? The bottom line is that a federal court ruled that "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is unconstitutional... Therefore, it HAS to change. This is not debatable... Hide behind the claim that you want to consult the men and women of our military to see how they feel about it... but what they feel, really, doesn't mean a fucking thing. Were they consulted before being sent to Iraq? Did anyone give a damn about how they felt when Bush BROKE THE LAW and DEFIED government leaders around the world? Why do you give a shit what they think now?? OHHHH cuz it serves your purpose! Duh, me!

Republicans are trying to say that this doesn't have a place in the DoD, but the fact of the matter is that this Act was initially adopted AS PART OF THE DoD during the Clinton administration. COULD THERE BE A MORE RIGHT PLACE TO REPEAL IT???

They don't think that the Dream Act should be attached to it. Ok, I'll give them that. I don't really think it should either. The Dream Act has to do with illegal immigrants. One of the most adamant speakers against this what Az Senator John McCain........ saying that irrelevant amendments shouldn't be tacked on to the DoD.
        "As Sen. Carl Levin (D-Mich) noted right after he spoke on the floor, the Senate had previously considered hate crimes legislation in 2001, 2005, and 2008. McCain himself "offered a non-relevant amendment to the defense authorization bill," Levin added, proposing "to acquire campaign finance disclosure by the so-called 527 organizations as an amendment to the National Defense Authorization.""  -excerpt from The Huffington Post

...... something about persons in glass houses shouldn't cast stones..... I'm just sayin'.

The Republicans are muddying the waters on the abortion Amendment, big surprise. This Amendment would allow abortion services to be offered at military hospitals. The Republicans are trying to say that this would allocate government monies for abortion services when the Amendment clearly states that the patient would have to foot the bill.

If you want my opinion, I think that a birth control such as Depo should be required for all active women in the military and, if that proves ineffective, I think abortion should be required if one turns up pregnant. Though this opinion would probably be considered extremist by most people and highly unpopular, I think that to willfully sign up for your 4 years of military service and then get yourself knocked up is not only irresponsible, but I think the equivalent of going AWOL and, yeah, could be considered treasonous. There, I said it!

The bottom line though, is that today's vote doesn't allow for any of these Amendments, but allows the Senate to start putting together a Bill and initiates the process of debate and Amendment writing... But Republicans will try to filibuster and block work on this because, yes... they want to add their special irrelevant Amendments and are just pissed off that they didn't get the first shot at tacking their crap on to the DoD.

Those fuckers!.... Yeah, I'm pissed off!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Talk Thursday: It's Not Rocket Science!!

So I've made reference to my Missionary Boys before.... I've got a new one that seems to love to challenge me... but I'm not sure how prepared he is to have me challenge him right back.

When discussing my NON belief in Hell or Satan or some such, he asked... "Don't you believe that everything has a counterpart? If you believe in Heaven, doesn't there have to be a Hell? And if you believe in God, doesn't there have to be a Satan?"

So I smiled sweetly and said, "Then you agree that there's a Goddess?"
His eyes bugged out a little and I continued, "Doesn't God make the rules? I don't think He's bound by the Marxist Law of Opposites."

Because no, the only Hel I believe in is the Norse goddess that was believed to protect and guide people to the realm of the afterlife, also called Hel. I KNOW!!!.... what are the odds that a Norse pagan mythology and Christianity would call it the same thing? Those pagans need to come up with their own ideas. Sheesh!

And Satan? No.... I can't believe in that theory either. Why would God, Jehovah, El-Elyon, Yeshua, Yahweh... the ever-perfect, Almighty Father, in His infinite wisdom create a being with enough strength to challenge him... then turn over so much power to him? Why would God, knowing us and our imperfections, knowing that we are born into this world as sinners, sanction us to an eternity of Hell for those sins? I ain't no rocket scientist... but don't tell me that a GOD, The God, can't have common sense...

And while we're on the subject.... tests? Why do people think that God has nothing better to do than sit on his throne and cast down trials and tribulations upon our heads? It's like some people really believe that God is a sadistic child with a magnifying glass on a hot day and we're nothing but His ants. This comes up because of my previous inquiry as to being punished for being sinners...... when we are born that way cuz God in His EVER-SO-INFINITE wisdom had the WHOLE freaking world to give to Adam and Eve... and put them right next to the tree that screwed us for eternity. A test? .... really? God's going to start it all by giving us a shot to fuck it ALL up? And I'm not sure when the war in Heaven started... but I know that angels came down and did a bit of frolicking with the dirty humanoids... so obviously post-Eden... My question here is.... God made man, put us in paradise, and Lucifer.. in the form of a snake, seduced Eve to the apple... and God punished her and her progeny till the end of time, and DIDN'T so much as give Lucifer a spanking.... ??? Who was REALLY God's favored child?

Why do Christians get so mad when you refer to the Bible as mythology? I certainly don't mean it as an insult. In fact, though I often point out that certain occurrences or ideas are not original to, nor isolated to Christianity- the fact that there are common themes and occurrences throughout most major religions is, to me, proof of some kind of Truth. In the same breath, the fact that so many, vastly different religions sprang from ideas based on the same Book, or parts of it, makes it impossible for me to say that any single one of them is The Right One.

One of my most favorite movies in the world is Dogma... I love this statement...
Rufus: He still digs humanity, but it bothers Him to see the shit that gets carried out in His name - wars, bigotry, televangelism. But especially the factioning of all the religions. He said humanity took a good idea and, like always, built a belief structure on it.
Bethany: Having beliefs isn't good?
Rufus: I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier. Life should malleable and progressive; working from idea to idea permits that. Beliefs anchor you to certain points and limit growth; new ideas can't generate. Life becomes stagnant.

Thank you Kevin Smith! One more.....

Serendipity: When are you people going to learn? It's not about who's right or wrong. No denomination's nailed it yet, and they never will because they're all too self-righteous to realize that it doesn't matter what you have faith in, just that you have faith. Your hearts are in the right place, but your brains need to wake up.

Some people might have a problem seeing past Jay and Silent Bob to get the meaty messages of this movie... But Kevin is brilliant! and it just goes to show.... that It's Not Rocket Science!!!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Kids Say The Darnedest Things....

Burp and I were arguing and he yelled at me "If I had a Dad, you know who I'd be more afraid of? YOU!"

Hahaha was that supposed to be an insult? I take pride in that response. Damn I love that little shit!

Monday, September 13, 2010

Sorry.... I just had to share....

Food for Thought...

Burp came home with a paper on Autism. Apparently, they'd had a discussion today in class about fellow students who are "a little different". I asked him what he thought about it.. He said it was kinda weird.....

I read an excerpt from the paper I received, "Someone with autism may feel really upset by noise and will try to shut it out of his ears. Noises you are used to might actually hurt them."

I asked, "Who does that sound like to you?"
He thought for a second, "GamerBoy!"
"That's right, GamerBoy has Asperger's, which is a form of autism."
I let him do the math. Finally, "I have Asperger's."
"That's right", I said. "Asperger's is different for you and GamerBoy, but there are a lot of similarities."
This led to a great discussion about how what he learned today applies to him.

I love when life gives me tools to work with. Everything can be a lesson. Sometimes it helps to have that little extra to put things into perspective.

The Little Things

Yesterday evening, Lucifer let us have Gemini for a whole 5 hours! He visited with his dad, played with Burp, and ate dinner with us.. I even got a hug. It was a good time.


Gemini is 11, he'll be 12 in November. I know not really a Gemini... I named him that because of the Jekyll and Hyde personality he supposedly has. Around me, he's never been anything but polite and respectful, but I've heard rumor that he can be a real turd sometimes. Also that he and Burp have had a lot of problems getting along in the the past. Most of that problem stems from the fact that Burp is best friends with GamerBoy, who is Gemini's cousin and best friend.... So there are some jealousy issues. I'm sure there's also some age difference and understanding issues. GamerBoy and Burp are only a year apart, and both have some similar symptoms of Asperger's, though GamerBoy's Asperger's is way more severe.


There are almost three years between Burp and GamerBoy and Burp can be even younger in some of his attitudes and responses. Gemini didn't seem to mind at all last night though. He just seemed happy to be here, as we all were. He even came to me and said, "I really like being here." Bittersweet. He's a good kid.. He just needs some stability and love.


I did however learn, he does not like broccoli. He likes green beans. I will remember this. And he and Burp have the same favorite ice cream, Mint chocolate chip.


I spent Friday cleaning Burp's room. For the last year and a half, his top bunk has been home to the last few boxes I'd yet to unpack. I finally did that.. Threw tons of shit away. Made the bed. Threw away all the broken and outgrown toys and organized what was left. I had really hoped that maybe Lucifer would let us have Gemini for the weekend... hahaha right, I know. But on the off-chance that she did, I wanted him to have a place. When he came over last night and saw that the bed was cleaned off and made up, he asked if I'd done that for him so he could stay over sometimes, and I told him it was. He smiled really big and said thank you.


Kids need to know that they're wanted. They need to know that you've opened up a place for them in your life. He seems to like that I've done that for him.


I have long held that blood doesn't equal love or family. Plenty of people in this world don't feel the bond of "family" simply because they're born to it. Family comes from the people you love, that love you in return, who make special places for you in their lives, not because they have to or are obligated by genetics to do so, but because they want and choose too. This is why I'm closer to my Papa than I am my biological father. This is why my son has a stronger bond with his Aunts Tandy and Chole, who are not in anyway related except through love, than he does with the Aunts who can legally call themselves such. This is why Burp has a baby cousin halfway around the world. This is why my mom, even through exasperation and frustration, gives her time and love to my batshit crazy adopted grandma.


Burp and I have long held that blood has nothing to do with family. I'm hopeful that our family is expanding a little.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Gotta Share This!!!! hehehehe

What Decade Is This???

Why can't people see that hate is hate?... It doesn't matter what side of the line you're on and it doesn't matter if you're answering hate with hate.
   Gainsville, Fl. REVERAND Terry Jones may, or may not, be planning to lead his congregation in a good 'ol book burning event. They might burn copies of the Quran to protest the building of the Islamic center planned to be built near Ground Zero.
As a "servant of Jesus Christ" instead of burning books, shouldn't he be encouraging people to follow his teachings?
"But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;" Matthew 5:44

I feel sorry for the people who are insulted by the building of this CENTER OF FAITH. I'm going to call a spade a spade here, but are you so shallow minded that you can't possibly, for 2 seconds, look outside of yourself for just  a moment?

1. This country was founded on the belief of FREEDOM OF RELIGION! with FREEDOM to PRACTICE that religion.
2. 9-11 was not instigated with church authority. This was a group of radicals who just happened to be Muslim. If they'd been Catholic, no one would be questioning a new church.
3. For just a moment... Can we consider that the building of the Islamic Center might be an act of good faith? Perhaps this is their way of saying, "This won't happen again!"

I am so tired of ignorant, close-minded people.

While I'm on the subject of news headlines... I want to make a comment on another one currently in the news. A Federal Court has ruled that Clinton's "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy is unconstitutional. Don't jump to conclusions. I think it's past time for this to no longer be an issue. Who you love should not be an issue for ANYTHING in this country. I am sorry for the 12,500 service men and women who've been kicked out of the military as a result of this policy. It isn't right, but I just feel that history is getting a bit blurred here. Can we remember what would have happened BEFORE Clinton instilled this policy if you were in the US Military and came out of the closet or got found out? Not good enough, but a compromise for it's time. And don't forget how outraged the haters were with even this little concession.

"Progressive success did the Gay Rights Movement gain during the last decades concerning the military issue. In 1942 the U.S. military took side in the controversial issue about homosexuality, as it banned all homosexuals and denied them the right to enter military service by arguing that their presence would make heterosexual soldiers feel "uncomfortable" and decrease their efficiency and productivity.
Although gays have been asking for equal rights since then, it was President Clinton who took the first pro-gay step. Being lobbied by successful gay rights activists, president Clinton introduced the so-called "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. Although "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" does not remove the ban of homosexuals in the military (what president Clinton had promised the gay community during his political campaign), it legalizes the existence of gay soldiers in the military as long as they do not publicly reveal their sexual orientation ("don't tell"). Furthermore, military officials are not allowed to ask soldiers about their sexual orientation ("don't ask")."


And interesting bit. This decision was made in Riverside, Ca... at the same time in history as the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy came into being.... weren't the citizens of Riverside trying to make it illegal for homosexuals to even LIVE in their town? ~ unfortunately, I have spent an hour on google trying to confirm exactly what this initiative was, and can't find it... Maybe mom can help me out...

HAHAHAHA

Well, I know how she found out about the phone call. Mouse's husband blabbed when Lucifer made a comment about the Plumber not even calling Gemini on his first day of 6th grade. (I called that one didn't I?) Nevermind that she'd conveniently LOST her phone and when he did try to call it, it went straight to voicemail..... AND THE MAILBOX WAS FULL!!

Did I mention that she forgot to pick Gemini up at the bus stop on his first day... And that she was in bed until almost 6 pm and he was locked out and had to go to his Aunt's house?

So I told Mouse the gist of our conversation and asked her what was really being said... She's saying, "I control Plumber's life."

hmmmmmmm she does huh?? This girl has no fucking clue.
I'm seeing an exorcism in the near future.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

An Interesting Occurance....

Hmmmm... I might have to take back some of the things I said about Lucifer.

Tonight, while Burp and I were having dinner, there was a knock on the door. It was Lucifer.

I was pretty surprised. We actually had a fairly decent conversation. She claimed to not have a problem with me and I told her that her issues were between her and the Plumber and none of my business. She actually said that she thought I might be good for him and that he'd only ever had one other girlfriend that she trusted with her son. She claimed to think I'm a good mom. She just requested that before I ever let Gemini use my phone again to call his dad, that I ask her first (a little ridiculous, I think) and that if he's ever left with me, she'd like to know (totally reasonable, in my book). She claimed that she's never tried to keep the Plumber from seeing Gemini, which I know is completely untrue..... Not just cuz I've been told so, but because I've been around this for a year now and have been witness to Gemini's great disappearances (when she gets mad at the Plumber and sends Gemini to her mom's house for a few weeks..) But I didn't argue. She said that she thought it best for the kids if her and I could get along... which I totally agree with... but we'll see if she means it...

She even tried really hard not to trash talk the Plumber to me. I have to give credit when credit's due... So maybe I'll take back "cunt" and maybe even what I offered to substitute it with. I'm very glad she came and talked to me. I've wanted to go talk to her, but after her referring to me as "fat bitch", I didn't feel very welcomed.. and also very much questioned whether it was my place to go talk to her... I really appreciate that she made the effort.

But I'm also no fool. Lucifer is known to be fairly bipolar-ish... so even IF she meant it all today, tomorrow's a different story. And I'm guessing at least half was probably lip service... I just haven't figured out her motive yet. Perhaps logic was her friend for the moment.

While I don't trust her as far as I can spit, the white flag is raised.... For now.

Xander Kisses For Burp!!!

Brownie Badge For Me!!

Lucifer doesn't seem to realize, everything she does... just makes me look that much better. Not that I do anything any different than I normally would... I'm just a naturally wonderful person, and she is .... well, E-VIL.

It's hard for me to imagine a mom and a wife that doesn't cook dinners. The Plumber and I didn't see eye to eye one night when I'd cooked dinner and he tried to make me dish up before he did. I tried nicely to tell him, "That's not how we do it." He tried to say it was. I finally won when I threatened to call my mother so she could back me up on it. Then he explained that he was just trying to be polite and that he wasn't used to being taken care of... that Lucifer had surely never cooked dinner for him.... I was like, holy crap!

I did laundry the other day. He said, "don't fold my laundry" some crap about me not being his servant. When he came home, he was like, "You folded it, huh?"
"uhhhhhhhhh, yeah... but.. BUT I didn't mate your socks! So there!" hehehe

Last night he was really bummed. He is out of town on a job and won't be back until maybe late tonight or midday tomorrow. Yesterday was Gemini's first day of Middle School and he really wanted to talk to him, but Lucifer hasn't been letting him see or talk to him since the night they showed up on my front porch. I told him it was better to try, and have her be a bitch, than not and have her be able to say he didn't try. So he tried, but her phone went straight to voice mail. He was really upset. I saw Gemini outside playing, so I snuck around the back of the building, called him over, and got him on the phone with his dad. They had a good 20 minute long convo and both were happy.

Except that the Plumber found out that when he gave Lucifer the receipt for the new shoes he bought Gemini, she returned them and bought herself some shoes. Fucked up, totally.. but his grandma bought him shoes so he does have new shoes for school. To calm the Plumber down, I told him he just had to think of it differently. To just consider that her mom bought her new shoes and everything is all good... but really, we all know, the boy should have then had TWO new pairs of shoes and FUCK THAT BITCH!!!

I can say that here, cuz I don't say it out loud... and I really want to!!!
FUCK THAT BITCH!
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK THAT SELF-SERVING, PIECE OF SHIT, TRIPLE CHEESEBURGER NEEDIN', WELFARE DRAINING, CHILD SUPPORT SNORTING, TWEEKER CUNT WHO'S MOTHER HAS HER KIDS 80% OF THE TIME BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T WANT THEM BUT SHE WON'T LET THEIR FATHERS HAVE THEM EITHER!!!

ok... I'm done... thank you.. pasting the smile back on... swallowing the rage. Just had to get that off my chest.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

.....Summer Has Come and Past...

It's been a good summer, for the most part.

There has been a bit of drama... The Plumber's sister is one of my best friends, and there is currently major tension between her husband and the Plumber.... to the point that there were several times a fist fight was only narrowly avoided. This has affected my ability to hang out with my friend, and Burp's ability to hang out with his friends... but I'm just hopeful that this will blow over and everything will be...... functional again.

The Plumber's ex-wife, who will evermore be referred to as Lucifer (because that is truly what the Plumber calls her) is not happy that he is now living with me. Did I mention that she lives directly across from me? She sits outside her front door to smoke and looks down into my apartment, so we now leave the front curtains closed 24-7. Apparently, the other day while I was at work, she screamed across the parking lot, "Have fun fucking your fat bitch!" The Plumber was livid... and doesn't seem to understand that I'm only upset that she called me a bitch, as I've never been anything but polite and respectful to her. Perhaps it was that we've been around each other many times at his sister's house, when she's been trash talking him, and I never said a word.. (Cuz it's none of my damned business!) Maybe it's the fact that when all Hell broke loose at the sister's house, and the Plumber showed up on my doorstep with his crying son, and I brought them in, fed Gemini, and put him to bed in Burp's room, and she came to pick him up - she didn't expect that the Plumber was asleep in my bed. It was hard to miss the shock as her bottom jaw bounced off the floor. Regardless, I'm not in denial... the fat part is obvious... but if she wants to call me a bitch- hell, I can act the part! Generally, I'm as sweet as pie... but if that little anorexic, strung-out,  2 dollar gutter slut wants to throw down, she's messing with the wrong "bitch"!

No- that doesn't mean I'm going to go looking for a fight, but if she brings it to my door- she'll only do it once.

But anyway.... Other than the bits of drama surrounding us, life with the Plumber is fab-u-lous! I'm a little bummed because he'll be working out of town for the next few days, and I'm not entirely sure when he'll be home... but, I also got a call to work tonight... so it'll even out some.

On another note...

Tomorrow is the first day of school. Where did the days go? Burp starts the 4th grade. Damn how time flies. It will be interesting to see what happens now that Burp has an IEP... There are things that I don't agree with in this school. There is no homework until October, as they want the kids to feel situated before they start homework, and when they do- it isn't nearly enough. One page, each, front and back of math and writing per week doesn't cut it in my world. This causes fights at home because I create more homework and Burp feels like he's getting the shit-end of the stick... Will he thank me for it someday? Probably not!

The one thing with this school that I do appreciate is how on top of things they are with his "issues". That has been a huge relief.

So here's to a great school year!
Cheers!

Monday, September 6, 2010

My New Favorite Thing...

My new favorite thing.... snuggling in the morning with the Plumber.. Burps new favorite thing?? Beginning at 5 am, starting softly, a continuous knockknockknockknockknockknockknockknockknock!!! Until I rip open the door for him to inform me that he's hungry. I remind him that he's 9... If you're hungry get something to eat. I tell him a list of things he can eat. I tell him, "I'll be up at 8, leave me alone." And he whines, "I just want a hug!" I hug him and send him on his way.

I climb back in bed and get snuggled up. 
And a half hour later, we do it again.

This time I ask him if he'd like his hands broken?
He gives me a hug.

I climb back in bed and get snuggled up.
And a half hour later, we do it again.

This time I tell him I'm going to sell him on eBay.
He tells me he loves me and needs a hug.

I climb back in bed and get snuggled up.
And GUESS WHAT??? A half hour later...... we do it AGAIN!

 This time I threaten to ground him to his room for the day. To ground him from tv and video games. This time I say, "I love you too, but no, this time you don't get a hug... You can have a hug, when I wake up at 8!"

I climb back in bed, and a half hour later... I don't even say anything, I stomp into the kitchen and I start the coffee pot. I growl and rumble at him. He chatters and talks all excited about some tv show we've both seen a million times and I try, politely, to ask him to leave me alone for a few minutes until I've had coffee. He leaves the kitchen for all of.... ohhh three minutes, and comes back more hyper than ever... and I banish him to his room for 15 minutes..... which is really only good for about 5.

I think I need to find some articles about the horrible things some horrible mothers do to their children and strategically place them around my house so he can see proof that I don't HAVE to be so nice about things. But in truth, that would probably backfire and make him even more determined to have continuous confirmation of my absolute adoration of him. The little brat!


.............. I suppose I can't end it like that. I do love him... but who wants to wake up like that? He's like a cracked out Chihuahua pumped full of Mountian Dew, a little less shaky.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Dare I Say It?

Life is.... good.

I've had a few very nice interactions with my Grandma and Cousin on Facebook. I miss them so much, but I'm glad to have them back in my life, even if only through FB.

School starts next week.

Football starts Saturday. Yeeeee Go Ducks!!

I'm reminded time and time again, that I've got the greatest, wisest,  most kind-hearted, understanding mom in the world.

Mr. Three Doors Down is no longer three doors down... But Mr. Left Side of the Bed, isn't any shorter. So, for lack of something better, The Plumber it is. The Plumber gets up at 5:30 and gets ready for work, and before he leaves he comes back in and covers me with smooches. Did I mention, life is good? He seems happy to be working regularly, to be living without drama, and seems to be getting used to someone who is considerate and wants to take care of him... I can't help it, it's in my nature, and it makes me happy.

Of course, this is a temporary situation... (we'll see about that!) He says he needs to be out of this apartment complex, that he just can't live this close to his sister and her husband.... but we'll see. We've agreed to take one day at a time... so nothing is set in stone... everything is subject to change.. and yes, I know that means it can go either way, and I'm okay with it.

The only down side to anything right now is that The Ex-Wife, who lives directly across the apartment complex from me, seems to have stashed their son at her parent's house. This is not abnormal for her. When ever it isn't convenient for her to have children, or she gets mad at The Plumber, she does this. Gemini is 11 though, and he sees it for what it is. But I know they miss each other, and that breaks my heart. He's a good kid. He just needs love and stability.

I hate it when parents use their children as weapons.

But, One Day At A Time... This too, shall work out.

For now, Life Is Good!