Talk Thursday: Appreciate, Validate, Communicate

I love John Edward, but this topic is a hard one. Sure I could talk about Charmin, but you guys have already walked that walk with me.

*sigh* The blinking cursor doesn't write itself.

I don't know if my mom so much believes that everything happens for a reason, or that she believes reason can be found in everything that happens. I'm not sure if she ever sat me down and said, "Psam, everything happens for a reason.." but I know she would ask me "And what did you learn from that?" Again, I don't know if she ever gave me a lesson on lessons, or just left me with the understanding that if you can walk away from a situation, no matter how horrible, having learned something, then it had purpose. Sometimes the biggest injustice isn't the actual incident but not taking anything away from it. I appreciate this as one of the most important lessons my mom ever gave me.

Through my father and my stepfathers, sisters, brothers, and friends I have learned that true family has nothing to do with blood or marriage but love and involvement. I am blessed with a stepfather who is more than his predecessors combined. I have friends who are more family to me than the siblings that are legally bound to me. I am greatfull and appreciative of those strong bonds, and remorseful for those that aren't what they should be.

In the time of year when sad stories abound, I am so relieved  that I have a good, loving, HEALTHY child. I see the ads for child cancer patients, starving children, abandon, neglected, and abused children and I am filled with relief that mine is home safe and healthy... then I feel guilt over that relief, but oh my gods, I would rather feel that guilt than not.

I am thankful that I live in a country that has standards of fairness. I can say and believe what I want. I have the ability to put food in my child's belly, put clothing on his body, and he has a school to be educated in (albeit a declining education). If I can't afford to do those things, there is more than likely help to be had. I am not blind to our country's problems, but I will never turn on the tv and see orphaned, homeless American children living in shanties with their bellies distended from hunger. That will never be my child.

There is an amazing family that is involved with our new Cub Scout pack. Happy and Kevin have been married for 15 years and until their recent tragedy, they had never spent more than three days apart. They have one biological child and have taken in countless other foster children. They currently have 8 foster and adopted children living in their home.

Last year they adopted several of their foster children, amongst them was then 2 year old Gracie. This October Gracie suffered a stroke. She and Happy have been in Portland at Doernbecher Children's Hospital since then.

Initially Gracie lost the ability to walk and talk. She can now walk some with a walker and is learning sign language. They are hopeful that she will regain most of what she has lost. Rumor has it that Gracie will get to come home on Thanksgiving.

This whole horrible situation has brought out so many examples of heroism. Happy and Kevin could have given up their foster children during this crisis. Instead, Kevin has continued to care for them with the help of their Scouting family. Families stepped up and divvied up the children in the initial scramble to get Gracie help and have continued by helping take kids to appointments, childcare, and whatever else has been needed.

We were able to give a bit of money to help ease their financial burden. There will be fundraisers to help cover costs that insurance won't. Because Gracie was adopted, she doesn't have the state insurance and I have heard that the insurance she does have won't pay for her wheelchair or all of her physical therapy. There are wheelchair ramps to build and endless appointments to keep and it puts joy in my heart to know that they won't do any of this alone.

It's heartbreaking that little 3 year old Gracie is going through this, but I find her new family so inspiring, and I am so proud to be a part of their Scouting family. I have never met Gracie, as we join this pack a week before her stoke, but I think of her and her family constantly.

I think of how differently this could have gone for Gracie. She very easily could have died. How different would this be for her if she hadn't found her way into that foster home? If they didn't have the support of the Scouting community? It makes one aware of the things they want to become, of how blessed I really am, and that if I had to walk in those shoes - I wouldn't have to walk alone.

I hope that your Thanksgiving is as truly blessed as Gracie's.
Peace and love, be with you!